I will never forget this blog and everything I wrote. It's pure bliss reading each and every post. My new blog is at immevisser.com

Today I feel like a fickly snowmobile.
I don't know what that is, but at the same time I don't know how I feel. Useless, perhaps, although that sounds too easy. Normally I would crawl back to bed on these days but today I have to be a social happy one and I'm not sure if I can actually pull that off. Even better, I have no energy or lust whatsoever today to really go back to bed. Does that make sense? 


I am so sorry to spoil the mood here. I just wanted to write again and in a cliché way, writing always works better when I feel blanco. As if there can only be emotions on paper and not in my head. Now that I think of it, I think I might even only write when I'm upset? That's why I don't write that often. Which is a good thing, I assume, but also a bad thing because apparently happy thoughts don't make for a nice read. 
This is unfair.

I'll be going to see MUSE next! In December. I'm so looking forward to it already, though we have seats and that will be weird. I never sit at concerts, especially not at MUSE concerts.
But well, we're going, anyway.
First stop though: Rock Werchter.

FIREWORKS

What do glam rock stars and dolphins have in common? They could both be seen at Guns n’ Roses’ concert in Ahoy Rotterdam this Monday.

Supporting act are Rival Sons, the American blues-rock band who give away an amazing show and offer the audience a long-haired men preview. They play for approximately an hour and then we -- quite young and quite girly opposed to the other people at the concert: old bald guys and people with farmer accents -- wait for the main show to begin. Guns n’ Roses front man Axl Rose has made a hobby of arriving late (one of the reasons Slash left the band), but not tonight. The lights switch off and the fireworks start, literally: the audience is treated to a full on rock show from the start.

The visuals are a mix of political images, a nature film featuring, yes, dolphins and odd, seemingly homemade videos of dramatic events. While performing sad songs like Don’t Cry, the screens show a blonde woman crying on her doorstep while her mascara runs down her face. Rose and the band show us quite some visuals too: they wear extravagant and colourful suede coats, big hats and sunglasses. In the middle of the concert Ron “Bumblefoot” Thal pulls out a sparkly orange hat and the Dutch crowd goes wild.

Although the visuals are chaotic, the band’s concert is very well put-together and shows the skills of Guns n’ Roses’ individual musical talent as well as how excellent they perform together. Axl Rose still has that unique and raw voice and reaches all his high notes easily, at the same time running around the stage as if he didn’t turn fifty this February. Between songs all band members get a solo moment in which they perform a song of their choice, varying from an amazing piano version of The Who’s Baba O’Riley by Dizzy Reed, to two really screeching rock ‘n roll guitar solos by Richard Fortus and DJ Ashba, and Ron Thal’s punky Glad To Be Here, a song he wrote for his band Bumblefoot.

Guns n’ Roses played a three hour long set, including hits like Knockin’ on Heaven’s Door and Paradise City, even though that meant they went on until after midnight. Ultimately, I had an amazing evening and a growing appreciation for fireworks.

Let's just go for it, shall we? Let's just go for everything. 
I don't mean to be another cliché person saying blooblahbleep and a thousand stupid sayings, but yolo.
Cryptic message, today. And if I live twice I'd have 2 nice lives, please.

ah, here was perfect Sunday. It was actually sunny and I decided to finally go running outside, because it was sunny and then only realised when already running that I don't like running in the sun. My head gets red and really hot.

Anyway, I ran! Which is an accomplishment.

Hi. I am looking for master/graduate programmes abroad and it is scary, yet so exciting! I really, really want to do this, I've always wanted to go abroad but I never quite made it (sad). And I can only blame myself for being too attached to my surroundings, friends, family, boyfriend. I wonder if I would survive abroad and that is just why I want to do it, test myself. Furthermore, of course, there's writing. There has always been writing. I just.. I can be emotional about writing: mad, crazy, smiling, grinning, dancing around, shivers everywhere, a bouncing stomach. It is creating life, on paper, but mostly in my head and I don't know what else I should do.

It's not even that I see myself as that great a writer, I just want to, need to, succeed in it. Make it my own.

So please, any Creative Writing master's programme, accept me. Thank you.

Love

I think it's sad that when people really try to make something work, other people don't see it. This sounds vague but I can't explain the whole deal. Let's just give someone a chance, okay?

It's study week and I don't feel like it, I usually don't mind studying but today I can't concentrate and all I think about is food and how-many-days-do-I-have-left-till-exam1?

So my first exam is Wednesday night, then I'll have an oral exam (eeek) on Thursday and I'll walk a show this Friday. Then Weekend. Monday will be my last exam-day and then we'll have a break and I will go on safari. In a zoo, that is. Ha.

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I remember that I always wanted to write fun blogs.

Thing is, I seem to have this block in my head that prevents me from writing anything other than meanless chitchat. I used to write all about my day and how ever little fun that sounds, it actually was fun because later on I could recall what I did 3 years ago and how I felt and I sometimes giggled about things I found funny 3 years ago, because I still find them funny.

Ever since I went to university to study English and had to write short, stupid essays in MLA style (meaning: you cannot write anything you want to write, it's all in this kind of opinionless code) my writing brain has frozen. I want to write 'however' in every sentence now and I forgot about cute adverbs and adjectives BUT here's the deal: this blog is going to be practise.

So, how unidentifyingly lame my first posts will be, I don't know. This is going to be my scratch paper and I hope soon, very soon, this blog will be alive again and full of posts about guacemole and dolphins and libraries.

Peace out

I still

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